Four random stories

Four funny moments/stories, in no particular order.

One: Rather horrible, actually, for horsey people like me, but even I had to laugh at the retardedness of it... The Grand National is the big hurdles-for-horses race here... They claim it's the biggest horse race in the world (funny, as no one in North America seems to give a crap about it, but that's how it goes. We'll see how much coverage the Derby gets here in a few weeks...)

Anyways, forty horses start; they don't all finish. Riders fall off, horses fall down--it's ugly. About half-way through this 30-jump, 4.5 mile long race (it really is a monster) two horses, without their jockeys, are still running along with the pack, taking the jumps. In fact, at this point, they're out in front of the pack, winning the race (for the moment) without riders. Right in front of a big hedge, they both balk, and instead of jumping, they run in front of it, block one of the leading horses and favourites, Clan Royal, from taking the jump, and knocking the rider off.

The jockey was fine--physically. This was his tenth time in the race; he'd never won before, and he actually had a chance on this horse. Bet he's not too pleased. But damn funny to see a bunch of riderless horses running (and winning) a race...


Two: The other Saturday event involved the woman known 'round these parts as horse-face: Camilla. (Never really understood that, as she's really not that bad looking, for a 58-year-old, especially.)

Anyways, watched pieces of the Charles-Camilla wedding (wow, was that a boring wedding--over by 6pm. DarNat, I hope yours sucks less.) My favourite part was seeing Stephen Fry (British comedian) and Mr Bean discussing each other's top hats (they were the only men with top hats, which is apparently odd, or something). I mean, Mr. Bean walking around a Royal wedding in a top hat--it sounds like a script for his show. I was just waiting for the slapstick to ensue... but it sadly didn't.

Other funny moment was seeing William and Harry--"the boys" as they're (rather oddly) called--waving at family members, making faces, and blowing kisses... while seated in the church. Nice to see they're (as) normal (as possible, given their inbred genetic material.)

Three: The other day, I was listening to two guys from Queens of the Stone Age (Atkinson would be proud) hosting a show on BBC Radio One, and they're playing everything from Tom Waits "Clapping Hands," to ACDC's "Long Way to the Top (if you want to rock and roll)" ...or, as the QOTSA DJs said: It's a long way to the shop, if you want a sausage roll. Damn funny. (BBC Radio is wicked-awesome, and available online. I recommend Tom Morton. Especially to James. B/c I think he'd like it.)

Four: Went to a party Saturday night (at classmate Emily's friends' place). Slept over, because the bloody tube stops running at midnight, and that just wasn't going to happen. Anyways. Took out my contacts and put them in a glass with some borrowed lens solution, and left it in the washroom. Next morning... glass was empty. I sincerly hope it got dumped out, and wasn't used to wash down a coupla Tylenol... Otherwise, my contacts are looking at the inside of someone's intestines...